The Intervention
Intervention is an act of great love.
It is a process by which loving family and friends help break the
illusion of the addict briefly to enable him to see that he has a
serious problem and needs help immediately.
Replacing Fear with Love.
At the intervention, the addict feels surprised and very scared. He
knows his past behavior has been shameful. He expects judgment and
condemnation. The first part of the prepared letters which the family
and friends read are expressions of love, fond memories, and respect.
They tell him that things have changed. Life is different now that he is
using.
Replacing Shame with Grace.
They also tell the addict that he has a disease that he cannot overcome
on his own. He is not a bad person but a sick person. The family loves
him and wants to help him be restored. They invite him to enter
treatment immediately. The majority of addicts are so overcome by this
demonstration of grace and love that they respond positively immediately
and go into treatment.
Replacing Denial with Determination.
If the addict does not respond to this offer, the second part of the
letters are read. These include specific first hand accounts of what
people have seen of the addicts use and subsequent behavior. This is
accompanied by a statement of how the family or friend felt at this
time. This is followed by a statement that the loved one is ready to
help the addict live, but not help the addict die. (Friends and families
are often enablers.) Enabling is a misguided act of love, which spares
the addict from the consequences of his actions and enable the disease
to continue its course. The training will help loved ones identify their
own enabling behaviors which the addict continues to rely on to get
through life.
Replacing Enabling with Boundaries.
Each person will then state their “bottom line’’. This is a statement of
how they have enabled the addict to continue his self destruction, and
how they plan to respond in a different way in the future. This new
picture of the future is very disturbing to the addict. They cannot
survive without a network of enablers. Of those who resist the offer of
love and grace, the majority will agree to treatment at this time. About
85% to 95% of addicts agree to enter treatment after these two phases.
Committing to Save Your Loved One.
If the addict still refuses treatment at this point he usually believes
that people will not stick to their bottom lines. He may even intend to
quit on his own. When he relapses (and he will) this will be a test of
your bottom line. If you stick to it, the majority of addicts will
quickly agree to enter treatment.